Coping With The Loss Of Another - How to mourn
You may have heard the saying that death is just the end of a surprisingly short forest path.
...And if you think about it, it sounds really peaceful.
If you’ve had someone really close pass away, however, then you probably know what it felt like at the moment you found out - The things you've heard, the people that you've seen in your lifetime, the buildings, the oceans, the earth, and sky – it is all utterly meaningless in that moment of quiet stillness.
Everything is so quiet, the most ear-shattering loss of noises and sounds that you have ever encountered…
If you are in this situation right now, just know...
Feeling sad and letting your emotions go wild is not a bad thing.
The truth is that it really does hurt, physically and mentally, but there is a way to not let it consume you.
There is no magic word, a potion, or a pill that makes the pain vanish.
It definitely helps to let those tears flow or you may wind up in a situation where you will not know how and when to express what you're feeling. Just don't let yourself get too comfortable in the fumes of those feelings. It's just not healthy, nor fair to yourself.
We Will All Pass
It sounds so easy to say it when you’re on the other side, but saying these words can change the feeling of despair.
That is If you understand the logic behind them.
These words give you the insight that it happens and you can't do a damn thing about it.
The sooner you realize this, the closer you are to reaching inner peace. At the end of the day, the important thing is to appreciate life.
Dying is, and always has been, the most natural event in the logic of the universe.
Every living thing in our surroundings is bound to meet the same faith as us.
Talking About It Helps
It really does, especially If you have a couple of stories that commemorate the legacy of this person.
Share them, be a little bit clingy and obnoxious, your friends will understand and support you.
Don’t stop reaching out for help by talking. Remember that you are doing this for yourself and you don’t have to be ashamed of that.
Sometimes talking may lead to an occasional bottle of alcohol or constant visitations to the grave of the loved one.
Other things like doubling your exercises or going to support groups may be of some efficiency, but nothing really beats a commemoration with your friends and a drink in memory of the person.
Having Dreams About Them Is Normal
Yes, you dream of that person and you wake up feeling like you've run a marathon. It's perfectly normal. But sleep is too important to not take action.
Try visiting the home of the deceased, try talking about it with their family, be supportive, and don't stray from receiving support – everybody needs it and no, you're not the exception.
Then a couple of months go by and things seem to be looking up. You still think about the person, but you feel that it's in a much healthier way, you frequently smile and laugh when someone says his/her name and It feels natural.
Finally, you realize that the important thing has always been to appreciate and love the people in your life while you can still touch and see them.
Life is too short to hold on to the people that are not with us anymore. On the contrary, celebrate their life.
Now... call your parents and friends and say you love them as if it was for the last time.